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A Pie to Have

You might have heard the saying “You can’t have your pie and eat it too.”  I’m not sure what pie is, but if it is anything remotely edible, I think that saying is stupid.  Why would I want to have pie if I can’t eat it?  What’s the point of that?

What I think that adage is trying to say is that you can’t have everything you want.  Well, that was certainly the case tonight.

As I’ve mentioned before, Daddy and Mama work different schedules with Daddy working at day and Mama working at night.  Lucky for me, Daddy had today off, but Mama had to go away as usual in the afternoon.  She doesn’t get home until really late, hours after I’ve followed Daddy into the bedroom and curled up with him, but whenever she comes home I always run downstairs to greet her.  Tonight was no exception.

We did our normal routine of greeting: I ran right to the door, tail a-wagging, then ran to the armchair, eagerly awaiting for Mama to put down her purse, take off her coat, trade her boots for slippers, and come over to love me utterly with pettings and scratchings.  Now every pet-and-scratch lovefest is by definition awesome, but tonight’s was particularly fabulous.  I leaned full into them.  If she stopped for even a moment, I maneuvered my head so that it was right under her hand – perfect petting position.  Oh man, this was just too much.

As she was petting me and cooing all sorts of lovies to me (“Who’s Mama’s good girl?  Piper is!”), something caught my eye on the floor: One of my half-chewed bones.  Oh, it’s not a real bone, but one of those pressed rawhide ones – but oh man, are they the best.  I could chew those things forever and not get sick of them (though I might get distracted).  I got to thinking: I’ve got lovies from Mama right now… Upstairs there is Daddy to cuddle… if I add my bone to that… That would just be a trifecta of awesomeness that has never been matched.

I jumped off the armchair, grabbed the bone, and ran upstairs.

I heard Mama snap her fingers, something she and Daddy usually do if I am doing something bad.  But I didn’t care: This was going to be so awesome!  I was already on the end of the bed, starting to slowly gnaw on my bone, when Mama came in the bedroom, saying to me, “Not in the bed, nuh-uh.”  I didn’t know what she meant.  No really: I’ve been allowed in the bedroom almost since I came home (that makes a good story too).

Mama quickly showed me what she meant by holding my shoulder with one hand – gently, but firmly – and with the other taking the bone out of my mouth.  Normally, I get really upset when anyone, even Mama, takes my bone away, but this time I opened my mouth to help her.  I was in a great mood, after all.  What are we doing now, Mama?

Mama took the bone out of the bedroom, and I chased right after her.  She leaned over the railing and dropped the bone down the stairwell, where it bounced down to the ground floor.

Ooh a game!

I ran down the stairs and retrieved the bone.  Fetch is not usually my favorite game, but with all the wonderful things tonight, I was feeling rather frisky.  I came back in the bedroom and jumped back on the bed, happily displaying my bone again.  Mama seemed surprised to see me, but she laughed.  Again, she held me and again I opened my jaws when she reached for the bone.  “The bone can’t be in the bed, Piper,” Mama smiled as she went to the railing again.  I barely heard her – I was going to get to fetch again!  She dropped the bone down the stairwell, and again I ran downstairs to get it.  Once more I dashed up the stairs, proud to do Mama proud.

But when I came upstairs, the bedroom door was closed all the way.

Normally this doesn’t happen unless I do something bad, so I was kind of confused.  I put down the bone and sat waiting patiently for some explanation.  Daddy came out for a second to go the the bathroom, but since he had just gotten up he wasn’t too awake and just went back into the bedroom.  Mama came out and picked up the bone.  Oh goody – more fetch!

Instead, she let me sniff the bone and lick it, but did not let me take it in my mouth.  She gestured with it, beckoning for me to follow her downstairs.  I did so eagerly.  She came all the way downstairs, bone still in hand.  I sat down on the landing and looked at her.  Something was amiss.  No playing?

Mama tossed the bone on the floor.  I cocked my head inquisitively.  She pointed to the bone.

“The bone stays down here,” she said, “This is where it lives.  Not in bed.”

Mama went into the kitchen and started getting a snack as I sat there on the landing.  At that moment I realized: I can have lovies from Mama and I can have cuddles with Daddy – but I can’t have bone-chewings with all that.  I could not have my bone and chew it too.

I went back upstairs to curl up with Daddy.  Life really can be full of disappointments, but at least I have a warm bed and two people to snuggle between.

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